So last night I really started to feel the withdrawl, tired, irritable add that to possibly getting sick- ears killing me- and E not feeling well and thus needing me every moment.... Anyways today was also rough. Trudging through. It is worth it!!! Still @ 229 but clothes fit much better and also that is a 5 lb loss from Thursday to Sunday! And I have had the energy to walk/pilates/yoga/calisthenics/dance every day except today so I am gaining muscle.

E is finally in bed and hopefully I will have a few moments. the carb cravings are kinda getting to me now. But I know if I stick to it, they will be gone soon. Instead of popcorn I roasted some zucchini in chip shapes until crisp and put some cheddar on parchment paper and made cheese crisps and dipped in mayo tonight. Bringing home my dehydrator to make some squash chips this week.... J is making venison jerky tonight. Sounds yummy even after a big ol venison tenderloin for dinner tonight. Surprised at myself for being able to eat it after having seen the buck it came from....

Have stuck to this WOE 100% so far!

Duh Moment..... Again

I was reading through Lesson 4 in 21 Life Lessons from Livin La Vida Low Carb and realized that I assume I will fail at this WOE (Way of Eating). That is a revelation that I would think would have been obvious to me, but it wasn't. I read how low fat diets, according to a 7 year study published in 2006, did not improve health or lead to significant weight loss. I read about Jimmy feeling miserable, deprived, constantly hungry and fraught with cravings during 1999 when he lost 170lb low fat dieting. I have been there. I have tried since a teenager numerous diets and I never succeeded, of course back then I was only 15lbs off being 'perfect' as I called it. To lose just 15 vanity lbs, as I was a size 9 back then and very very fit, I set myself up on all kinds of low fat and trendy diets that led to cravings, constant hunger, binges of eating from deprivation, then emotional eating and on and on until at 20 years old in 1998 I had gained from the healthy range for my frame and build of 170lbs to 225. All in trying to lose 15lbs to look more like a model I saw on TV or Magazines!!! Wow. I just realized all this and it makes my head and heart reel....

So my point?

This is a WOE not a diet. It makes me feel full, energetic. It stabilizes my blood sugar to a normal person's range with the help of tiny amounts of insulin as I have destroyed my pancreas with all this dieting and weight gain, and need a bit of insulin. It is improving my health as I am also learning in this book. It truly is a lifestyle change that improves me, not some fad diet I can't wait to get off of. And it is not like the others I have tried and failed at killing my self worth and making me feel as if I were a broken person who could never do anything because I couldnt do this basic thing - calories in calories out, self control etc. I will succeed and keep the weight off and be healthy!

I have also realized something else. I had focused on low carb because I am diabetic and so I felt cursed, doomed, and self pitying because unlike 'normal' people I HAD to eat this way or die. I came to low carb via Dr Richard K Bernstein's Diabetes Soloution and he states over and over how healthy this WOE is but I didn't catch it. Now I see that EVERYONE should be low carb to improve their health and I don't feel miserable and deprived because so and so around me can down half a pecan pie or even just a slice and be fine because I know what that is doing to their health, to their heart, to their liver, to their odds of cancer which feeds on sugar. When will everyone wake up and see the truth? I feel so sad for them

CBS This Morning, AstraZenneca,Lipitor & LowCarb

Ok. So I am watching CBS this morning and was half listening to a segment about peleolithic diets with a researcher saying yes they were healthy with no heart problems etc. but they didn't live long and showed a cave man being smashed by a boulder. I thought to myself, are you insinuating that yes low carb is healthy now but int he long run we just don't know because cave men didn't live long enough for us to know? What? And then it goes on to say that the reason they didn't eat starches or grains is because you have to cook to digest them and cavemen didn't cook. So the researcher said we should combine paleolithic healthy diet with carbs because of modern technology and put an equation in big letters on the screen, I believe it was Ancient Diets + Modern Technology = Healthy Diets. They later said that afterall ancients didn't always have the best ideas stating that those in Napoleans time robbed graves for Egyptian mummies and ate them, and that foe centuries sailors thought they could live on just dried meat and biscuits and they got scurvy. When it was all over it announced this segment was funded by AstraZeneca!!!

Earlier they had a segment on hot dogs mexican style which have chorizo topping and I think I saw cooked wrapped in bacon and Mo Rocca said "can I get some Lipitor to go on top of that?"

Talk about subtle marketing with your laid back Sunday morning arts and humanities news show....

Sorry for typos and such, typing one handed again

Yesterday was another low carb success!! I am feeling so much clearer of mind and stable of mood. I feel I need to add a few more calories as I am breastfeeding because I wake up hungry mid night, Possibly because E nurses most of the night. I am a bit concerned about ketones in breastmilk. But I have at least read enough research to be not to concerned, make sense? I need to do more. Got Jimmy Moore's new book today and am reading trough it. I love what Dana Carpender said about reaffirming low carb with books, blogs, websites, chat rooms, forums as we do not get enough support in real life and/or are bombarded by dopamine inducing marketing and reinforcement of well meaning others stating we need this high carb food to feel happy, comforted and fulfilled. So we have to seek out our own dopamine programming.

1st day of official low carb and getting to listen to a Holiday Survival teleseminar with Jimmy Moore!!!!

Today is going great! Had warmed up leftover creamed spinach mixed in with lo carb pasta and sausage sauce. For lunch had 2 hamburgers with cheese and mixed veggies, no breads or bread subs. If I get hungry this afternoon I will have a glass of water and then 1/2c of heavy cream. E and I went for a walk this morn also. And am about to put on music and dance with her and try to do some yoga/pilates. Upping my water intake has also helped my mood and cravings. Need to alter Lantus dose as my fasting bG was 186!!!!! I dont think that can just be from the cookies last night as I covered with insulin well 12u of Novolog. So this morn I took 5u of Novolog and then jsut 10u of Lantus a bit later and will try Lantus also tonight.

Update: So far via fitday.com: 1,789cal, 151.1fat,44.0carbo,68.9 pro.
About where I want to be very close to it!
Fat 75%, carbs 9%, and pro 16%

Maybe a bit low on calories, may add 2tb pb or 1.4c cream or both. which would be
2,100cal,181.1fat,47.7 carb,74.1 pro, fat to 77% and pro 14%.

weight232

Today started great. 2 eggs, cream, and sausage pasta sauce with cheddar cheese. Lunch grilled creole chicken breast, mix veg, cream spinach. Then it started: poporn 2c of it at 2pm.... dinner was 2 hamburger patties, melted cheese, mix veg in cheese sauce. Then I made PB cookies. Only had 1/2c of sugar in the whole batch but stil to much natural pb and a total of 1.5c sr flour....... I ate 7.....

Huge improvements but a way to go yet. Tomorrow?

Oh yeah, this morn I only took 10u of lantus instead of 18

Been a miserable few days low carb not low carb and everything between......
Caught a look at some photos taken this weekend and compared them to last May/June... Sharing them.

YIKES! In my mind I am a size 14, lumpy feeling but much smaller than reality size. How does that happen? The mind thing?

I dont want pictures of my familys first holidays to be of me like that. It is to late to make a huge differance but at least I can FEEL better. I felt so great back in May and June of last year. I want that again. Considering posting these images on my fridge and bathroom mirror. My poor dh, I am so so ugly and he never complains.

How do i stick to lc changes when I am so stressed?

Today went well. 2 boiled eggs, 1/2 rice cake and 1/2c cream, lunch was curried lc veggies and tandoori chicken. Then for he afternoon we went to my Nanny's. Tomorrow she turns the keys over to new owner. Tonight was the last night to be there, to have my daughter there, with Pop gone and being there it just seems he stepped out and I just missed him but will catch him next time, but with N at Aunt Shirleys it will all be to real..... Anyway, walked in to movers carrying out her things and to a big bowl of halloween candies, my fav mini bars.... I ate probably 4 w/o stopping to breathe, and then the rest of the afternoon ate 8 or so more plus a zebra cake pack, and the went to Dairy Hill for a corn dog..... I truly eat away my emotions as a robotic response. I must be careful with addiction to food.... Ah well, try again tomorrow...

Day 1

Today was day 1. 1,994cal, 164.4 fat, 48.4carbo, 72.8pro! Awesome considering we went to Applebee's for Veteran's Day. I had the french onion soup w/o bread but with cheese, and took the meat and cheese off the french dip slider. It was yummy. I did take 1/4 of a roll and ate it as we planned on walking and I had my normal 18u of Lantus that morning plus am nursing so did not want to be on trail to low. Because of E I would rather be a bit high than low. 230lb today. Size 22 jeans but that has more to do with post surgery/pregnancy lower abdomen than anywhere else...

Feeling the light headedness. Will drink a 1/4c cream and have some cheese before bed and lots more water.

I am doing this!